Cringe
by xuzux
Summary: A not so good


-  
>Another normal evening.<p>

I'm sitting in my room drinking a glass of milk and trying to watch Tom and Jerry, the bitch in the next room is screaming and crying so loudly that i can barely pay attention.  
>"Would you just shut the fuck up already?" I scream<br>She continues her crying, just as i knew she would. Their always so loud. I try to ignore her, but by the time i'm done with my milk i can't stand it anymore.  
>"Shhh Its okay, everything is going to be alright." I say loudly enough for her to hear me as i get up and walk into the other room. Can't they ever just shut up?<br>I open the door and there she is, sitting on the floor covered in her own blood, naked and chained up by the ankle, just as i left her. She starts screaming even louder as she sees me opening the door. As i stand there watching her scream, covered in her own blood, i get the sudden urge to cut off her head and have sex with her body. I walk over and open a cabinet on the wall. The cabinet is full of many different kinds of weapons, and some other fun things. I figure the garden shears may be fun to use, but the axe is what i take out. She sees it and begins screaming even louder, which is something i didn't think was even possible.  
>"Dont worry, everything is going to be just fine now" I whisper to her, though i don't think she heard me over her screaming.<br>I kick her in the face, and she falls over. Her screaming stops and now it is just crying and moaning. I'm sure that just like plenty of the others, she's realized her screaming is pointless. I put my foot on her head to hold it in place and begin hacking at her throat with the axe.  
>"I would not like them here or there. I would not like them anywhere. I do not like green eggs and ham. I do not like them Sam I Am." i scream while chopping away.<br>Her crying has stopped and she makes gurgling noises as the blood shoots out on the walls, on the floor, on me, on everything. I try to take my time so she can enjoy this. Finally with one last chop her head comes off and her body lies there motionless. I lick a little blood off my lips, put the axe back in the cabinet, take off my pants and start walking towards the body.

-  
>Morning Routine<p>

I wake up and roll over. I've been sleeping for awhile but I want to sleep more. Looking at my clock i realize that it's already two pm. I don't have to work today, so that doesn't really matter. Infact i don't have to work anyday because i don't have a job. My parents were rich and whenever their bodies were found chopped into peices, their body parts tied to tree limbs, i inherited their money. Too bad for my little brother, he didn't get anything. I laugh for a second thinking about that, and figure that Its starting to get boring laying in my bed unable to go back to sleep and thinking about random things, so i get up and put some clothes on. I walk into the kitchen and put a pan on the stove then open my refrigerator and look at all the body parts and food. Finally I take out a peice of someone's thigh and the milk. The thigh goes in the pan, i pour myself a glass of milk, and i read a chapter of the Adventures of Tom Sawyer while its cooking. Once i'm done eating i go into the livingroom and put a dvd in that is just random videos of people being killed and what not that i edited together from plenty of different sources, this is something i usually do everyday. When i'm done i get up, put a CD in, and listen to the Lion Sleeps Tonight while thinking about what to do with my day.

-  
>Someone from the past<p>

I've decided to go to the book store, a man can never have too many books. So i'm walking down the street because i decided i didn't feel like driving, and I start thinking about who my next victim is going to be. As if on cue i walk by someone who seems very familiar.  
>"Eric? Hey, Eric Watson.. Is that you man?" Says the guy i just walked past.<br>I turn around and look at him. He's a very skinny man with short black hair, wearing glasses and a nice suit. After a few seconds of standing there awkwardly i realize he is someone i went to high school with. If i'm remembering correctly, his name is Sean Astor. We weren't friends because i didn't have any friends, well any real friends, because i don't like people and only to pretend to be friends with someone when i can gain something from that friendship. He was a nerdy guy, big thick glasses, always talking about Dungeons and Dragons, and got beat up alot. I guess because I was one of the only guys he talked to in school that didn't beat him up he thought we were friends. It's not even like we talked often, every now and then he would talk to me and I wouldn't tell him to shut up or something like that, like pretty much everyone else did.  
>"How ya doing buddy?" he asks.<br>I don't want to talk to him, but maybe I can kill him later. Besides, i have nothing else to do but go to the book store so i decide why not.  
>"Oh, you know." I say to him, trying to talk with a friendly tone of voice.<br>"Yeah. It sure has been awhile. Listen though, i need to hurry, i have an important meeting in thirty minutes, but give me a call and we can catch up sometime." he says.  
>Ofcourse i don't want to do any catching up with him, but since he could be a future victim, i take the card he is holding out to me and put it in my pocket.<br>"My number is on there, just give me a call sometime. See you later" he tells me  
>"Will do. Bye" I say<br>I put the card in my pocket and we walk our seperate ways.

Playing with animals.

On my way home from the book store i'm carrying a large bag filled with books i've already read and own. In it is A Tale of Two Cities, One Fish Two Fish Red Fish Blue Fish, Heroes And Villains: The True Story Of The Beach Boys, To Kill a Mockingbird and Goodnight Moon. Yes, i already own all these books, but ya know, a man can never have too many books. I'm so tired of walking, specially carrying all these books and finally I get to my house. There is a large cat sleeping in my yard and I figure its my neighbor's cat and ignore it as i go inside. Once i've set my bag of books down I decide go back outside and pick up the cat. Once I'm back inside I sit down in one of my rather nice chairs and hold the cat in my lap. Theres a few blood stains on the arms of the chair I realize and make a mental note to clean that later.  
>"You sure are a cute little thing" I say petting the cat.<br>I pet the cat for a few more minutes then i get up and go take a pair of scissors out of a drawer. The cat's tail snips off easily with the scissors and it makes a loud cry of pain. It starts hissing and clawing and scratches my hands. So I start cutting off its legs, making it unable to scratch me anymore. Next I cut off it's ears.  
>"Now don't bleed to death yet, time for a little more fun" I say to the cat.<br>In the other room I grab a can of gasoline from the cabinet then move back to the room where the cat is. The cat's blood is getting everywhere and i notice that it has gotten on my carpet. I hate when animals and people stain my carpet with their blood. Now I'll have to clean the chair and the carpet. The cat is squirming and trying to move but it's not getting very far on the stubs it now has for legs. I pick it up and move into the kitchen, then set the cat down in the sink. There is now a trail of blood on my carpet leading to the kitchen. Damn animal, who does it think it is getting blood all over my carpet? I hit the cat a few times then cover it with the gasoline. Theres some matches in the cupboard over the sink so i grab those and light one.  
>"Have fun little guy" I say to the cat and then drop the match in the sink.<br>The cat makes noises for a few seconds and then its silent.

A little hot water

Its starting to get dark now and i'm feeling rather bored, like always, so I decide to go find me a prostitute. When you are in need of someone to kill, a prostitute is always easiest. Its almost like they want to be killed. So I turn off my tape of Cheers and grab my car keys. I walk outside and get in my car and drive toward 8th street, thats where alot of the prostitutes are in this shithole town. Once I'm on 8th street I see the girls standing there at the corner and I choose one I like. I stop my car at the curb next to a tall young looking girl with brown hair. Tons of different ways I could kill her ran through my head as I stared at her through my open car window.  
>"Hey, how about you get in and we go back to my place?" I say to her<br>"Alright honey but i hope you got lots of money cause i aint cheap" she replys  
>" Oh don't worry, i have lots of money" I say<br>She gets in the car and we go back to my place. She trys to make some small talk on the way there, but I'm not very talkative. Ofcourse I never am, unless I want to be or it's needed.  
>" Wow, this is a very nice place. Very clean too." She tells me<br>"Yeah, i'm a little bit of a neat freak." I say  
>"There is something on your carpet though, what is that?" She says looking at the blood from the cat.<br>I hit her on the head with a bat i had sitting by the couch and she falls to the ground, unconscious. Just like so many of the others I think to myself. Six hours later she wakes up tied down to a table and all of her teeth have been removed, needles are jammed into her gums. She starts screaming and crying like they always do.  
>"Awww whats wrong darling? Are you in a little pain" I say mockingly<br>She trys to say something back, but with her mouth full of all the needles i jammed into her gums its hard to understand her. I walk over to the cabinet on the wall and i try to decide which size knife i would like to use. I choose one with an 8 inch serrated blade. I walk back over to the table she is tied on.  
>"You know I was going to wait for you to wake up before I took your teeth out, but you were just taking too long. Guess I hit ya a little too hard huh." I say to her.<br>She just lays there staring up at me and crying. I'm sure now she is regretting ever deciding to be a prostitute. I stare down at her and I begin to sing.  
>"Knee deep in flowers we'll stray<br>We'll keep the showers away  
>And if I kiss you in the garden, in the moonlight<br>Will you pardon me?  
>And tiptoe through the tulips with me"<br>As i say the last word, me, i bring the knife down into the middle of her chest. I cut downard, to about an inch below her belly button. She's still alive, but she is dying so i have to hurry. I walk into the kitchen and grab the pan of boiling water that I put on the stove while she was still unconcious. I walk back into the room and she sees me with the water, she has no idea what i'm going to do with it and starts screaming again. I spread open her chest/stomach and i pour the boiling water in there. She screams even louder and i just stand there smiling, enjoying my work.

-  
>My kind of game<p>

Today I woke up, did what the stuff I usually do every morning, and sat down to watch Gone With the Wind. This has always been one of my favorite movies and I make it a point to watch it atleast once a week. Once the movie is over i am left with an overwhelming feeling of boredom. Yes i'm bored. Thats a surprise right? I put on a cd and listen to Frank Sinatra. Ol' blue eyes always helps me think. While listening I decide to give Sean Astor a call. The card he gave me assured me that Sean Astor is indeed his name. If he's not busy then we would probably have to have lunch or something stupid like that before I could get him to come back to my place. Quickly i decide i do not want to go to lunch, so i think of a lie to tell him that i think would get him to come back here. Is he still obsessed with dungeons and dragons? I wonder if i tell him that i've got the game and would like him to play it with me would he come right over. Its a rather dumb idea, but if he's still as nerdy as he used to be I figure that he would infact come right over, so I look at the card he gave me and I dial the number.  
>"Hello?" Its him<br>" Yeah, Hi, Sean. I just got this new edition of Dungeons and Dragons and remembered that i have your card and that you used to love it, so i thought i'd call you up and see if you want to play" I say. I don't even know if theres any new editions of the game.  
>" Wow Eric, Thats pretty cool. I didn't think you were into the game. I'm kinda busy right now, but i can put off what i'm doing to play some D&amp;D with an old buddy" he says. The man is an adult now and he still plays the game. How sad. Then again it might be fun, I never wasted my time playing it so I don't know, but I highly doubt it.<br>" Aww man thats great, i live at 1305 over on West street. you know where that is?" I ask  
>" Yeah man, i know where that is. It's not far from where i used to live" He replys<br>"Well thats great. You should come on over whenever you get the chance" I say  
>" Alright man, well i'll probably be over there in about thirty minutes then" He tells me<br>"Okay, see you then" I say and hang up.  
>I continue to listen to Frank Sinatra while waiting for Sean to get here. Eventually i realize that i should be getting things ready and i go to prepare things for Sean's arrival. Finally he gets here, exactly 2 minutes late. The doorbell rings and I go to answer it.<br>"Hey, hey man." Sean says as he walks into the house.  
>He gives me a hug and i feel very uncomfortable. I hardly even knew this guy in high school and here he is giving me a hug like were good old friends.<br>"Just take a seat over there on the couch and i'll go get the game so we can get started" I say  
>"Yeah alright man, hurry up because i'm excited!" He says and laughs. Wow, this guy must have a really boring life if he is excited about playing that game.<br>I go into the other room and grab the chloroform and a rag. Back in the living room i pour some chloroform onto the rag and from behind cover Sean's face with it. He struggles for a second but quickly loses consciousness.  
>When he wakes up Sean is naked and tied to a table.<br>"What the fuck? What are you doing? What's going on?" He screams  
>"Oh Sean, were just playing a little game. That is what you came here to do isn't it?" I say<br>"What the fuck? What the fuck?" He keeps repeating. It's funny how much people say that when they are scared.  
>"Come on Sean, you can do better than that." I say<br>"Please man. I thought you were my friend. I just wanted to catch up, play some D&D. What the fuck are you doing to me?" he says  
>"Well Sean, you are about to find out" I tell him.<br>I walk over to the cabinet, and he's still screaming what the fuck in the background. I take out the mini-chainsaw and upon seeing this Sean starts to scream hysterically.  
>"Oh what the fuck! What are you going to do with that man?" he screams<br>"A man can never have too many books" I say and then i begin to sing  
>"Whoa! I feel nice, like sugar and spice<br>I feel nice, like sugar and spice  
>So nice, so nice, I got you"<br>And as i'm singing this I shove the mini-chainsaw blade into his asshole and move it around so as to widen it out. Ofcourse as i'm doing this he is screaming in pain. Finally i figure that the hole is now wide enough and i take the chainsaw out and move across the room to grab the vacuum.  
>"What are you doing now? Just stop it!" He screams<br>I stick the vacuum cleaner hose in his now widened asshole, i keep shoving it in there until i can't fit it in anymore. I turn it on and it begins sucking out Sean's insides while he is still alive. He screams in agony, the pain so unbearable he can't even form words anymore. As he is dying the last thing Sean hears is me saying  
>"Good night sweet prince."<p>

I'm the only one

It's a few days later and ofcourse i'm rather bored. I'm sitting in a chair, drinking a glass of milk and looking out the window. Its a clear and sunny day outside. I figure if i look out the window long enough then someone has to walk by. Whoever it is that just happens to walk by is going to be my next victim. I've been sitting here for hours and just as i'm about to get up i see a little kid riding his bike down the sidewalk. He looks about six or seven. Relief that someone has finally gone past my window washes over me. I walk over to the door and open it.  
>"Hey kid, yeah you, come here. I need to ask you something" I yell to him<br>He looks around. Then seems to think about it for a second and slowly he rides his bike over to me.  
>"Didn't your mom ever tell you not to talk to strangers?" I say and pull the kid inside.<br>He is kicking and screaming, and this really angers me. Man, I hate kids.  
>"Shut the fuck up and quit kicking me" I yell at the little brat.<br>Ofcourse he doesn't shut up and doesn't stop kicking, but it's not like i was really expecting him to anyway. I take him into the other room, tie his arms together beind his back and tie him to a chair.  
>"Please don't hurt me mister. My mommy finally let me ride my bike alone and i just wanted to go down the street. Please don't hurt me. Please" He begs<br>"The wonderful thing about tiggers  
>Is tiggers are wonderful things<br>Their tops are made out of rubber  
>Their bottoms are made out of springs<br>They're bouncy, trouncy, flouncy, pouncy fun, fun, fun, fun, fun  
>But the most wonderful thing about tiggers is I'm the only one" I say as i take a knife out of the cabinet.<br>He begins screaming again. I stab into his stomach and cut across, leaving a long deep cut in his stomach. Blood begins pouring out.  
>"I'm the only one."<br>I reach my hand inside the cut i just made and i pull out a handfull of his intestines. He stares at the intestines in my hand and begins to scream even more as i pull them and other organs from his body. Finally he loses consciousness and things are quiet again.

-  
>A day at the pool<p>

This morning i had myself some of the boy i killed yesterday. He was pretty tastey but for some reason I think adults taste better. I pour myself another glass of milk after breakfast and sit down to read Where the wild things are. This book always makes me feel so...Happy. I like how the boy becomes friends with monsters. I don't have any friends but if I did have any they would be monsters too. We could kill people together. I've decided to take a break from the killing today, decided to go for something I don't do everyday. So, what to do? I guess i'll go swimming. Swimming is always nice and i haven't gone swimming in a few weeks. Even though i hate people and being around people, i like swimming so i decide to go to the public pool. I get there and there is tons of people here. Like always, but oh well. I jump in the pool and swim around. I don't know why like swimming so much. There are very few things in this world i like, killing, books, movies, music, and swimming. Maybe a few more things, but those are what i can think off of the top of my head. Suddenly i feel a tap on my back.  
>"Hey Eric! Long time no see. You look great" Its my ex, Mary.<br>Geez, whats with seeing all these people from my past lately. I dated Mary years ago. Before i realized just how much i hate people. I mean I always hated people, but one day I realized I wanted them all to die. Suddenly remembering our relationship I really want to kill this girl.  
>"Yeah, thanks. You look pretty good yourself "I say trying to be nice so that maybe she can come back home and i can kill her. I'll forget about taking a break for now.<br>"Well, we should get together some time. I haven't seen you in so long." She says  
>"Ya know this is crazy. I just ran into Sean Astor the other day, you remember him? I haven't seen either of you in years and now i ran into both of you." i say<br>"Maybe it's fate." she says  
>" Maybe it is" I reply.<br>"So, how about sometime next week?" She asks  
>"Well, why not today?" I ask<br>"I'm busy today and all this week, but i'm not next week so then is perfect." she says  
>"Well, alright, next week is good i guess." I say<br>"Alright, I'll see you then" She says  
>"Bye" i say and quickly leave there because i can't stand being around her any longer without killing her.<p>

-  
>A visit from Paul<p>

Today i got a call from my brother Paul. I haven't seen him in years. When he was five i killed our parents. I was old enough so that I could just take their money and buy my own house. I didn't want him to come live with me, so he went to an orphanage. I wonder why he wants to see me now. I had no plans for today, so i told him he could come on over. Why not i figure, maybe i'll just kill him and save myself the trouble of finding someone today.  
>In the middle of cleaning the blood stains on my carpet from the cat i killed earlier this week my doorbell rang. Must be Paul. I put up what i was using to clean the carpet and i answered the door.<br>"How ya doin brother? It's been awhile" Paul says to me when i open the door.  
>"Yes it has, and i'm doing fine." I reply<br>He's grown alot. I mean he is an adult now. He's almost bigger than me.  
>We walk over and i take a seat on the couch and motion for him to take a seat on the chair on the other side of the table infront of me.<br>"So, what is it you wanted to see me for? Youve had years to come see me" I say  
>"Well Eric, I know what you are. I mean, i know what you do." He says<br>"What?" I ask, confused.  
>"Yeah, I know you kill people, and i know you killed mom and dad.. When you killed them you fucked me up. I was only took my parents from me and you made me go live in an orphanage. I started to hate people. Soon, I began killing people. Then one day I thought hey, why don't I go give my brother a visit. I mean, why not kill the man who caused me to be like this? So here i am Eric. Here, to kill you." He says<br>Suddenly he jumps up, pulls a knife from his pocket and brings his arm down to stab me. Ofcourse I'm got off guard and surprised but my reflexes are fast, and as soon as he began getting up i grabbed the bat from beside the couch. Before he could stab me i hit him with the bat and he drops the knife. Now he has no weapon.  
>"Not a very smart plan you had there Paul. I've been killing longer than you, you can't outsmart me." I say<br>He gets a look on his face like he realizes he is defeated and he runs for the door. Ofcourse i just happened to forget to lock it, and he runs faster than me so he got to the door and ran out. I go to the door and see him running off down the street.  
>"I'll fucking be back Eric" he yells while running off.<br>I laugh and shut the door. If he does come back then i won't make the mistake of letting him get away again.

-  
>Fun with Mary<p>

While watching Little House on the Prairie today I remembered that i had seen Mary at the pool last week and she wanted to get together sometime this week. I also remembered i hadn't even gotten her number or anything. I had wanted to get away from her fast, just being around her made me want to kill. So, I grabbed the phone book and i looked her up. I found her number, grabbed my phone and gave her a call.  
>"Hello?" She answers.<br>"Hey, Mary. It's me Eric." I say.  
>"Oh hi Eric. So i'm guessing you still want to get together?" She asks<br>"Yeah, are you doing anything today?" I say.  
>"Well, actually no. You want to have lunch or something?" She says.<br>"No, I don't really feel like going out today. But I just rented this great movie, you could come over and watch it with me." I say  
>"Yeah okay, that sounds great." She says<br>So i tell her my address and she tells me that she'll be over in an hour. I put a Big Bopper record in and i begin to prepare things for her arrival. It's always good to be prepared. Around an hour later I hear a knock at the door. Finally, she's here.  
>"Hey Mary, so nice to see you." I say as i open the door.<br>"You too Eric" She says and gives me a hug.  
>I motion her to take a seat on the couch and i put in a movie. The movie is It's a Wonderful Life. One of my favorites. I walk over and i take a seat next to her on the couch.<br>"So, how have you been doing Eric?" She asks  
>"I've been doing pretty good. Ever since my parents died life has been great." I say<br>"Yeah i heard about that. I'm so sorry. My mom just died recently, so i know its hard." She says  
>"Did you know that if you sneeze while holding your eyelids open that your eyes will pop out?" I ask<br>"What?" She asks laughing.  
>I'm already bored with this so I grab the bat from beside the couch and hit her on the head with it. I guess I didn't hit her hard enough because she's not unconscious and she begins screaming. I hit her again and finally she's knocked out. I carry her into the other room, take her clothes off and tie her to a table. Just like so many of the others. Finally she wakes up and ofcourse she begins screaming and begging for me to let her go. They are so predictable. I grab a clothes hanger that i have straightened out from the cabinet on the wall and i begin heating the tip with a lighter.<br>"Oh god. What are you going to do with that?" She asks  
>"Sweet, sweet Mary. It's okay. Just think of the pain as a good thing." I reply<br>The tip of the clothes hanger begins glowing orange and I figure that its hot enough. Slowly i jam the clothes hanger into her left eye. It's sizzling, and shes screaming and the smell of burning flesh is starting to make me hungry. After a few minutes i figure it's been long enough and i remove the clothes hanger from her eye. I walk over to the cabinet, put it back in and take out a knife. Well, more like a machete really. The blade is eighteen inches long. She sees the knife and she begins asking me what i'm going to do with it and begging me to put it back. I walk over to her and I stick the knife in her cunt. Only a few inches, and i begin moving it in and out. Ofcourse she is now screaming louder than before.  
>"No other factory in the world mixes its chocolate by waterfall. But it's the only way if you want it just... right." I shout over her screaming<br>She is now pouring blood from her cunt. I bend over and lick some up.  
>"Why the fuck are you doing this? You're crazy!" She screams<br>"Crazy? CRAZY? I guess you could say that." I say and shove the machete all the way inside of her.

-  
>Going for a walk<p>

I went to get into my car today, thought i'd go find a prostitute, and i realized that all of my tires had been slashed. Probably some asshole kid. So i decided to go for a walk. Maybe I can convince someone to walk back home with me. I turn into an alley off of my street and i see a woman pushing a baby stroller. I could knock her out and take her back to my house but because of the time it would take someone might see me carrying her back. Quickly I think of the easiest and best plan and start to make my way towards her. I walk up behind her quietly, she doesn't even notice me. I should have been a spy or something. I take the knife i had in my jacket pocket out and quickly slice her throat from behind. She falls to the ground clutching her throat and i look around one more time to make sure there is nobody around. She just lays there making gurgling noises as the blood spews from her neck. I pick up her baby from the stroller and run back off towards my house. She stares after me with a look of sheer terror on her face, wondering what i'm going to do to her baby i'm sure. When i get to my yard i realize that my door is wide open. I know for a fact that i didn't leave it that way. The baby is crying and screaming and it is really annoying me. Damn kids. I step into my house and everything is trashed. My CDs, records, DVDs, just everything is all over the floor, all over everywhere. First my slashed tires, now this. Someone is fucking with me. It has to be Paul. My house being a mess really bothers me, I'm a bit of a neat freak. But I can't clean it right now, I have a baby to take care of. I walk into the kitchen, put the baby in the microwave and set it for five minutes.

Relieving some anger

It took me about 4 hours to finally get my house clean. Paul is really starting to piss me off. First he came into my house and tried to kill me. Second, it had to have been him that slashed my tires and trashed my house. At first i wasn't even going to waste my time finding Paul, but no one makes my house dirty. I grab the phone book and begin to look him up so that I can get his address and finish him off. I look for thirty minutes, checking and rechecking, but he's not in here. He must have known i'd try to find him.I realize he's probably taken every precaution to hide where he is. I'm not good at finding people, just at killing them. Guess i'll just have to wait for him to come to me. Feeling defeated i decide to kill someone to make myself feel better. Killing always makes me feel good. I did just kill a mother and her baby earlier today, but theres no such thing as too much killing. I still haven't gotten new tires for my car, so I walk over to Main street and get a taxi. I figure a prostitute will be easiest like always and i have the cabbie take me to 8th street. We stop at the curb in front of the girl i've chosen. I show her a handfull of hundreds and she gets in the cab. She tries to make conversation on the way to my house but i'm not paying attention and don't hear anything she says. We get to my place, i pay the cabbie and we head inside. Once inside I lock the door and without wasting any time head straight for the bat beside the couch.  
>"So. Nice place you ha" She's cut off in midsentence because i knock her unconscious with the bat.<br>When she wakes up she's lying tied down to a table. Surprised? I notice that she's opened her eyes and I grab a razor from the cabinet on the wall.  
>"The itsy-bitsy spider<br>Climbed up the water spout  
>Down came the rain<br>And washed the spider out  
>Out came the sun<br>And dried up all the rain  
>And the itsy-bitsy spider<br>Climbed up the spout again" I sing while cutting the fingernails off her right hand with the razor.  
>"Why are you doing this?" She screams<br>"Well, my brother pissed me off, so i'm killing a little more than i usually do today." I reply  
>Finally everyone of her fingernails has been cut off. I go to the cabinet, put the razor back and i grab a spoon. I walk over to the girl and i scoop out both of her eyes with the spoon.<br>"Oh grandmother, what big eyes you have" I say  
>I walk into the kitchen and grab the can of gas from under the sink. I put it there the other day when i was done playing with the cat. Once i'm back in the other room i pour some of the gas into her empty eye sockets until they are full. I light a match.<br>"And she'll have fun fun fun til her daddy takes the t-bird away" I say and drop the match into one of her eye sockets.  
>The flame from the one socket ignites the other. I try to stand there and enjoy watching my work, but like always the smell of burning flesh makes me hungry and i go to the kitchen for something to eat.<p>

-  
>A present<p>

I took a walk to the book store today. I didn't buy anything because I already have many copies of every good book they have. I just looked around, trying to find something new. On my way home i noticed a new pet shop. I decided i'd stop in to by a puppy. The inside of the pet shop smelled horrible, like animal shit and the woman behind the counter was a bitch. Back outside i'm walking down the street and I see someone who looks familiar. It's a woman pushing a stroller with a small baby inside. I think she is someone I went to high school with. The city I live in isn't really a big one, but damn. She notices me and stops to talk.  
>"Wow, hey Eric. I haven't seen you in years" She says<br>I can't remember her name so i just say "Yeah, Years."  
>"How have you been doing?" She asks.<br>"Pretty good." I say  
>"Thats good. Well look, I know we haven't seen each other in years but I really need to get the baby to his doctor's appointment. Maybe we'll run into each other again sometime" She says<br>Suddenly I realize that she could be a future victim so i decide to ask for her number. She gives me her number and i put it into my cellphone.  
>"So give me a call sometime" She says<br>" Will do." I say  
>We both say bye and walk our different directions. I realize that I didn't know her from high school. She's someone I worked with a few years ago when I got a job to help with how bored I always am. Ofcourse the job just made life even more boring. Finally I make it to my house and I'm imagining all the ways i'm going to torture this puppy i've just bought when I open my door and notice a body laying in my living room floor. I'm so surprised by this I drop the dog and it runs off somewhere into the house. The body is of a girl, rather good looking. I walk over and I notice something carved into her back. It says<br>"Your time is almost up Eric"  
>I'm sure this was something Paul left here to scare me. Instead he's left me with a new body to have sex with.<p>

A tastey milkshake.

I'm sitting on my couch watching a documentary on Albert Fish when I suddenly realize how bored I am. I could go get another prostitute and kill her, but I've been killing alot of girls lately. Sometime its nice to change things up a little. So i'm sitting here trying to think of a way to find a man to kill. Suddenly an idea pops into my head and I get up to get dressed so i can go to a gay bar. I put on some clothes that I think the gay men will like and put my bottle of chloroform and a rag in my coat pocket.  
>Once I'm here its loud and there is alot of bright colored lights spinning all around the room. As soon as I walk into the door I can feel their eyes on me. Maybe it's just my imagination. I go up to the bar and order a drink. Looking around i notice one guy at the end of the bar keeps staring over at me. I order a drink and tell the bartender to give it to the guy whos been staring and to tell him that its from me. Seconds later he has his drink and is walking towards me. He takes a seat right next to me and he has this big smile on his face. I think he's already pretty drunk.<br>"Hey big guy. Thanks for the drink" He says  
>"Your welcome. Listen, would you like to come back to my place?" I say<br>"Wow, you sure do work fast. I don't even know your name" He says  
>"Eric. It's Eric Watson." I tell him. Doesn't hurt to tell him my name. It's not like he'll be around to tell it to anyone.<br>"Well, it's nice to meet you Eric. I'm Thomas." He says  
>"Great. Now that we know each other would you like to come back to my place?" I ask<br>"We just met..But you are pretty sexy, and I am pretty drunk...What the hell. Lets go" He says and laughs  
>I give a fake laugh and say " Cool lets go"<br>I get up and walk to the door and Thomas follows me. Once outside we get in my car and head to my place. The whole way there he is telling me stories about him and his gay friends and how they went to a Madonna concert or something, but i'm not paying any attention. I just keep saying things like "yeah" and "uh huh".  
>Finally we are at my place. I unlock the door and move over to let him walk in ahead of me.<br>"Wow Eric this place is very nice." He says  
>I don't even reply. On the way to the front door i had opened the bottle of chloroform in my pocket and poured some on the rag. As soon as he finishes his sentence i put the rag over his mouth and nose. He squirms for a few seconds but soon he is motionless. Later he wakes up naked and tied to a chair.<br>"What the fuck? Is this some kind of sex game Eric? This is too kinky even for me" He screams  
>"No dear Thomas, i'm afraid this is no game." I tell him<br>He begins screaming. I grab a mouth restraint, the kind that holds a mouth open, from the cabinet on the wall and attach it to his face. Its kind of hard because he isn't cooperating, but I get it done. Now I grab a knife from the cabinet. Thomas sees the knife and ofcourse he begins screaming even more.  
>"Shhh. It's okay Thomas. It will all be over soon" I say.<br>I begin walking towards him and I start to sing.  
>" Come on in and pull yourself up a chair. Let the fun begin it's time to let down your hair. Pee-wee's so excited. Cause all his friends have been invited. To go wacky at Pee-wee's playhouse"<br>I use the knife to cut off Thomas's dick and his balls. He's bleeding alot more than I thought he would and screaming louder than I even knew a man could. He sounds like a woman. I walk over to the table infront of him and I put his dick and his balls into the blender on the table. I put the lid on and turn the blender on the highest setting. After about a minute I figure that its been long enough. The blender is now full of little chunks and blood. I walk over to the cabinet on the wall and take out a funnel. I put the funnel into Thomas's mouth and he can't spit it out because of the mouth restraint. I hold up the blender full of his dick and ball chunks and blood and being pouring it into the funnel. He's choking and gagging but chokes down most of it.  
>"How'd your own dick and balls taste Tommy boy?" I ask<br>I walk into the other room and examine my record collection. I pick out an Elvis record and go back into the room with Thomas and put the record on.  
>"Have fun bleeding to death pal" I say<br>I turn off the lights and shut the door. I can still hear Thomas screaming over "Blue Suede Shoes"

-  
>Whats her name<p>

I was using a blow torch on the face of the puppy I bought the other day when i remembered the girl I had run into. So I decided to call her up. I told her I wanted her to come over for lunch so we could talk and catch up but she said she didn't want to because she doesn't have a baby sitter. I told her that it was okay and to just bring the baby and she finally agreed. A few hours later the door bell rings and I let her in. She tells me what a nice place I have, something usually everyone does, and I tell her to take a seat on the couch. She pushes her baby's stroller over there and takes a seat. Suddenly the phone rings.  
>"I'll be over over there in a second just let me get that" I tell her and walk over to the phone.<br>"Hello?" I say when i answer.  
>"Your time is ticking brother. I'm coming for you" A voice says.<br>" Fuck you Paul. You are a fucking dead man." I say and hang up.  
>I'm very pissed off now. Paul's fucking with me is getting very annoying. Now I don't even feel like playing nice for a bit. I walk into the living room, sit down on the couch and grab the bat from beside it.<br>"What are you going to do with that?" The girl whos name i can't remember asks.  
>I hit her on the head with it a few times and she is outcold. Her baby is laying in it's stroller crying. When she wakes up she is naked and strapped to the wall by her neck and ankles. Her baby is in it's stroller next to her. Infront of her is a table and on it is the blender I used for Thomas' dick and balls milkshake a few days ago.<br>"Eric! What the fuck is going on?" She screams.  
>"You want to know something funny? I don't even remember your name" I say<br>" Please just let me go. I have my baby to take care of. What are you doing to me?" She says  
>"If you'll notice i have taped a knife to your hand." I say<br>She looks at her hand and there it is, the knife i taped to it.  
>"What is it for?" She asks<br>"You will either cut yourself open or I will drop your baby head first into this blender" I say pointing to the blender.  
>"You are fucking crazy!" She screams.<br>" I want you to do it like this" I say and show her by rubbing my finger down my stomach starting from my chest.  
>"You fucking psycho. I'm not going to do it!" She yells at me.<br>"Okay then. I was going to drop your baby off at a police station after you did it, or maybe a hospital. Somewhere safe ya know. But now i'm going to have to drop it into the blender. " I say.  
>I walk over and pick up her baby from it's stroller. Its not too big, probably 2 or 3 months old, and it's kicking and screaming. I walk back over to the blender and i hold the baby over it by one foot and turn the blender on with my other hand.<br>"Say goodbye to your baby" I tell her and begin lowering it towards the blender.  
>"Fine! Fine you sick fuck! I'll do it" She screams at me<br>She lifts her arm and she cuts her stomach.  
>"Deeper bitch!" I scream and lower the baby to right above the blender.<br>"Okay!" She screams and jams the knife all the way inside of her stomach.  
>She moves the knife down and slices her entire stomach open. Intestines and other organs spill out of her and onto the floor infront of her. She collapses to the floor, laying there in a pile of her own organs.<br>"Here's looking at you, kid." I say and drop her baby head first into the blender.  
>"No!" She cries out as I just sit there, enjoying watching them die.<p>

I'm sitting in my basement and pouring some acid over a whats left of a body. Usually I eat the body and whats left i melt away. Out of nowhere my doorbell rings. Who could that be? I have no friends. So I get up, take off my gloves and walk back upstairs. I open the door, but theres no one there. I look down, and theres a package. It seems to be leaking something from the bottom. Something very familiar, blood. Once i'm sitting down I open the package and find a head staring up at me. Its pretty rotted and the stench would make the usual person gag, but I like the smell. Theres a note in the box too.  
>"Next time it'll be your head in a box." the note says.<br>Must be from Paul. If he could really kill me then why doesn't he just do it? Why keep playing these stupid games? I hope he's having fun while he can, because once he comes for me he won't be doing anything ever again.

Today I was eating my breakfast when the doorbell rang. It better not be another one of Paul's stupid games. I opened the door but instead of Paul or something left by him it was a man and a woman, both holding bibles.  
>"Hello sir, we came here to talk to you about the lord."<br>I tried really hard to hold back a laugh, and invited them in. This was great, the victims for today came right to me.  
>"Please, take a seat" I said, motioning them towards the couch.<br>They thanked me for being such a nice person and sat down. I grabbed the bat from by the couch.  
>"So, who wants to go first?" I asked.<br>They just sat there with a weird expression on their face. Staring at the baseball bat in my hands.  
>"Uhh what?" The man asked.<br>I hit him in the head with the bat and the woman began screaming. He didn't pass out, but got up and came towards me. I hit him again, twice, and he fell to the ground. The woman just sat there screaming.  
>"Shut up already" I said and hit her with the bat. Now they both lay there, unconscious.<br>I took them in the other room, and tied them both down on a table, naked. Its a good thing I have two tables in this room. Finally they wake up, not at exactly the same time, but pretty close. Their screaming all the usual stuff people scream once they wake up. The man starts trying to calm the woman down saying stuff like  
>"its going to be okay honey, we'll be fine. just calm down."<br>Ofcourse their not going to be okay.  
>"So, is this your wife?" I asked him.<br>"Shut up you bastard and let us go!" He yells at me.  
>"Hmmm, I'll take that as a yes."<br>I walk over to the cabinet and I get me a knife out.  
>"Me and your wife are about to have a little fun." I say<br>"You leave her the fuck alone!" he screams  
>I go over to her and I slit her throat. The man screams, she screams, the room is full of screams. I get up on the table with her and I put my dick in the cut in her throat and begin to fuck it.<br>"You sick fuck! Get off of her!" he yells out.  
>"Things that bother you,<br>never bother me  
>I feel happy and fine!<br>AHA!  
>Living in the sunlight,<br>loving in the moonlight  
>Having a wonderful time!" I sing while fucking the hole in her throat.<br>Finally she's dead, and its his turn now.  
>"Hmmm..Lets see.. How do you want to go buddy? Ah! I've got an idea" I say to him.<br>I wak down into the basement and get the acid I was using to melt bodies the other day. Once i'm back in the room with him I grab his hair and pull his head back.  
>"What the fuck are you doing now?" he asks.<br>I start pouring the acid down his throat. He screams and trys to close his mouth but the acid just melts through his lips. His throat begins melting and his stomach too. Its a rather nice sight and I smile.

I'm standing in my kitchen, chopping up a body to eat later. Suddenly i'm blown off my feet and in horrible pain. My whole house is on fire and I can see a hole in the floor in another room. I stand up, even though its hard and painful, and I take the gun i keep in the knife drawer out. I don't really like to use guns, but i've always kept one there just incase. I'm still holding the knife i was using to chop up the body in my other hand. Must have been a bomb under the house, i'm guessing thats why theres a hole in my floor. Must have been Paul. Too bad for him it didn't kill me. I stumble through the house, trying not to get myself set on fire. I'm already covered in burns from when the bomb exploded, and theres a piece of wood sticking out of my left leg. Finally I get to the door and step outside. Standing there in front of me is Paul.  
>"You don't look so good bro. You alright?" He asks with a smile on his face.<br>"I'll be much better in a few seconds when your dead" I say  
>"No, i'm afraid you have it all wrong. It's you who is going to be dead." He says<br>He pulled a gun from a holster.  
>"It sure was nice knowing you" he said<br>He pointed the gun at me and I fell to the ground. Before he could pull the trigger. On my way to the ground I shot him in the chest with my gun. Suddenly he has a horrified and surprised look on his face. He clutches his chest, drops his gun and falls to his knees.  
>"I thought I finally had you. I thought i'd finally done it. I'm sorry Eric. I'm sorry I couldn't kill you" He said with blood coming from his mouth.<br>I walked over to him and stood there looking down at him and him looking up at me. I could hear police sirens getting closer in the background. Ofcourse they saw the fire and smoke.  
>"Its okay Paul" i said as i lifted the knife in my hand into the air. I brought the knife down, right into his forehead. He fell over dead, still staring up at me.<br>"DROP YOUR WEAPON!" I heard a policeman scream at me. I hadn't even noticed him and his cop buddies arrive.  
>"I SAID DROP YOUR WEAPON!" he yelled at me again. I raised my gun to up to point it at him and suddenly I heard many loud bangs, the sound of the cops opening fire. I was hit 5 times. I fell to the ground and began bleeding everywhere. Slowly i'm beginning to lose conciousness, and this I think, this is the end.<p> 


End file.
